Golf Is Not A Game of Perfect - Ten Valuable Reminders

 “Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent’s.“ -Grantland Rice

Rainy weather and some aching shoulders have convinced me to take a couple of days off from golf. But, as I've said in an earlier entry, I've become a certified "nut" about the sport. Can't stop thinking about the game even when I'm not playing it. I know. Certifiable. 

I've read a few books on the game and one of my favorites is "Golf is Not A Perfect Game", by Dr. Bob Rotella. Read it about a year ago. Great book. Full of wisdom, especially on the mental aspect of becoming a better player. So this afternoon I browsed back through the book and revisited the things I highlighted back then that have truly been helpful for me. Thought I'd share them here as well as any observations I have about them. Enjoy.

Golf Is Not A Game of Perfect - "Rotella's Rules"

1.  "Golfing potential depends primarily on 3 things: a player's attitude; his skill with his wedges and putter; and how well he thinks."

• Most players work on - at best - only 1 of these. I'm pretty good with my short game, but I've also been learning that "attitude" and "thinking about the game" has nothing to do with JUDGING oneself. 

2.  "Golf is not a game of perfect. No matter what happens with any shot, accept it. When a shot is done, it's done."

• The best golfers - and certainly the ones who have the most fun with it - have short memories.

3.  "Decide before the round starts how you're going to think, and do it every shot. Choose to think well. Have fun. Focus."

• The challenge of this is doing it the ENTIRE round. 

4.  "Learn to love the challenges. Why? Because the alternatives: anger, fear, whining, cheating - DO NO GOOD.

• This in itself is an absolute GEM to remember: not only on the golf course, but in the rest of Life!

A crazy shot by Jordan Spieth this year!

5.  "You cannot hit a golf ball consistently well if you think about the mechanics of your swing as you play. A golfer must train his swing, and then trust it." 

• I have slowly learned that THINKING about my shot has never helped me improve it. My mind can give me a MILLION thoughts about "fixing" the swing. But change only occurs when I can FEEL what needs to change. 

6.  "The foundation of consistency is a sound pre-shot routine."

• This has been the biggest challenge for me to stick to. Same set up and routine every time. Assess the shot. Pick the target. Visualize and practice swing. Look at target. Look at ball. Swing freely.

7.  "Before taking any shot, pick out the smallest target. Smaller the target, sharper the focus, better the results."

8.  "Hit the shot you know you can hit, not the one you think you OUGHT to be able to hit. Conservative strategy, Cocky swing,"

• In other words, I have to "know" my game, my tendencies, my strengths and weaknesses. You'd think you do, but it's surprising how often I'm playing and just "hoping" for things to happen "right".

9.  "Attitude is what makes a great putter. Balance determination with nonchalance. Believe you'll make the putt every time."

10.  "Love golf for what it teaches you about yourself."

• This last one is so true, and why I think I've become so much a fan of playing this game. There is no end to the learning that one can receive when golfing. The infinite variables of clubs, climate, grounds, competition, and mentality provide constant opportunities to learn something new. And the most valuable things I know I'm learning are those things that are inner and timeless: perseverance, honesty, striving for excellence, humility, staying in the present moment, letting go of what doesn't serve me....and always, always....starting over. The power of Beginning Again. 

I get them close, every now and then!

That's a nice list of reminders to carry with me the next time I go out. Thank you, Dr. Rotella, for inspiring these for me. Ten solid pearls. 

"I Was Raised By..." - A Lesson in Gratitude

 "Love your parents. We are so busy growing up, we often forget they are also growing old.”  (Unknown)

My mother has been on my mind lately. 

A Mom selfie with sibs and in laws - 2021. Makes me smile!

Somehow, as the unknown sage above noted, I've acutely noticed my own "growing up" and advancing age over the last few years: my retirement from the world of work and move into a more "leisurely" life; my own increasing aches and pains (When did just getting up out of a chair become an act to be accompanied by a mighty "groan and shuffle"?). 

But somehow I'm shocked by the fact that my mother has been aging and slowing down. Since I only see her maybe once a year so, I think my memory serves as a kind of "placeholder" - freezing her in a snapshot of my last visit - and ignoring the fact that time rolls on, eroding us all. 

Mom on her 75th birthday - 12 years ago

But she is aging. And inevitably, she will be gone - certainly sooner than my mind could ever imagine, because my mind cannot comprehend a world without my mom. That is the fate that awaits all of us.  A fate that we blithely ignore or dismiss for most of our adult lives, until the reality of it can no longer be avoided. And when that realization genuinely comes to us, we have a choice. We can either resist it or mourn it - greedily trying to hang on to what we call "our self" and the world we know. Or we can work to gratefully remember all that we've been given during this time called "our Life", and we can work to begin letting go of all seems so "important", for that which is Divine and Higher. We can take the time to remember what we Love. 

The Blazers' biggest fan - Spring 2021

So this entry is about being grateful. Grateful for all that my mother - Mary Ann Schnorenberg - has given me over my lifetime. It is inspired by a piece of writing that I did 3 years ago that I had forgotten about.  It was part of a writing assignment that an English teacher I was subbing for had given her students. It was in connection with a book they were reading (I forget the title). But as the students worked on writing their pieces, I decided to do the same as I sat at the teacher's desk. And this is what I wrote. I'm forever grateful to this teacher for the inspiration she unknowingly gave me that day. 

It's called "I Was Raised By..." I don't know if I ever shared it with anyone, but I want to now. Thanks to my sister Katy for many of the photos here. 

I WAS RAISED BY… (Feb. 2019)

I was raised by a small woman, but a strong one.

A lover of books, and a poet.

A digger in the dirt who planted flowers and green beans.

And sometimes just liked to sit and watch them grow.

Mom in the garden - 2019

A teacher of everything good that makes me who I am today.

“Be good and have fun – in that order.”

“And if you can’t do both, then be good.”

Small hands – but a big heart.

Mother of eight – who loved each of us as if we were the only one.

She planted her roots in her home and her children.

Mom and us kids on Mt. Hood - circa 1970

But her heart is with the birds, and the trees, and the squirrels.

I know she speaks their languages and knows them each by name.

I have seen – through her – how Love and Kindness can change the world.

Through her laugh. In the simple act of holding hands.

And in every letter, note, and card, she has scribbled and scrawled,

One of many letters she sent me

Timeless gifts. Overflowing with Love and confetti.

I cherish all of these things, and most of all, her.

Great things comes in small packages

Especially ones named Mary Ann…and Mom.

Mom and I on the night I proposed to Deborah - Christmas Eve 2005

Me, Izzy, Mom and Katy - Summer 2018

A quiet moment - May 2022

I love you Mom. Always. Your pioneer and poet, Jonathan